Latest funny quotes, page 5
Hickory dickory dock,
the mouse ran up the clock;
the clock struck one
and down he run;
hickory dickory dock.
limerick by Mother Goose from Tom Thumb's Pretty Songbook (1744)
Added by Dan Costinaş
1 comment - Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
There was a young belle of old Natchez
Whose garments were always in patchez.
When comments arose
On the state of her clothes,
She replied, "When Ah itchez, Ah scratchez."
limerick by Ogden Nash
Added by Dan Costinaş
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
There once was a man from Nantucket
Who kept all his cash in a bucket.
But his daughter named Nan,
Ran away with a man
And as for the bucket, Nantucket.
limerick by Dayton Voorhees from Princeton Tiger (1902)
Added by Dan Costinaş
1 comment - Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
This limerick goes in reverse
Unless I'm remiss
The neat thing is this:
If you start from the bottom-most verse
This limerick's not any worse.
limerick by Zach Weiner from Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Added by Dan Costinaş
1 comment - Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
A funny old bird is a pelican.
His beak can hold more than his belican.
Food for a week
He can hold in his beak,
But I don't know how the helican.
limerick by Dixon Lanier Merritt (1910)
Added by Dan Costinaş
1 comment - Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
A Tailor who sailed from Quebec,
In a storm ventur'd once upon deck,
But the waves of the sea,
Were as strong as could be,
And he tumbled in up to his neck.
limerick by John Marshall from Anecdotes and Adventures of Fifteen Gentlemen (1821)
Added by Dan Costinaş
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
And let me the canakin clink, clink;
And let me the canakin clink
A soldier's a man;
A life's but a span;
Why, then, let a soldier drink.
limerick by William Shakespeare from Othello, Act II, Scene 3 (1603)
Added by Dan Costinaş
1 comment - Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
There was a small boy of Quebec
Who was buried in snow to his neck.
When they asked, "Are you friz?"
He replied, "Yes, I is —
But we don't call this cold in Quebec!"
limerick by Rudyard Kipling
Added by Dan Costinaş
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
There was a young lady named Bright,
Whose speed was far faster than light;
She started one day
In a relative way,
And returned on the previous night.
limerick by Arthur Henry Reginald Buller from Punch, or The London Charivari (19 December 1923)
Added by Dan Costinaş
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
There was a young lady of Spain
Who couldn't go out in the rain;
For she'd lent her umbrella
To Queen Isabella,
Who never returned it again.
limerick from Punch, or The London Charivari (30 March 1904)
Added by Dan Costinaş
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!